如是說999

Question: Sadhguru, if you are in a very unsupportive relationship with someone, how can you move ahead on the spiritual path without getting stuck?

求问者：萨古鲁，如果你和某人的关系很不和谐，你要如何不受阻碍，继续顺利地在灵性修行之路上前行？

Sadhguru: If your concern is spiritual growth, then if you have a demon for your partner, that is the best thing! But your husband or your wife is not just about spiritual growth. If you also want to have a pleasant life in the family, you have to choose someone you like. But there is always something that you do not like about any human being on the planet, isn’t it? You use that part of it for your spiritual growth, and the rest of it you enjoy as life.

萨古鲁：如果你谈论的是灵性成长，那么如果你有一个魔鬼般的同伴，那将再好不过！不过，你的丈夫或妻子不仅仅是关乎你的灵性成长。如果你同时也想要拥有快乐的家庭生活，那你必须选择喜欢的人作为伴侣。但是无论任何一个人，他/她总会有让你不喜欢的地方，是吧？你把不喜欢的那部分用来修炼灵性成长，而剩余喜欢的部分就当作享受生活。

If your intention is to have a good family, then some rapport is needed between two people; that means there have to be some areas of commonality at least. To build a rapport takes effort, it takes compromise, it takes love and it takes endurance. If you want to build a rapport with someone who is not supportive, but you do not want to go their way, it takes lots of endurance. People whom you love are not easy.

如果你是想要一个美好的家庭，那么两个人之间的和谐是必须的，也就是说至少在某一方面两人要有共同的东西。建立一个和谐的关系需要付出努力，需要妥协，需要爱，也需要忍耐。如果你想和一个和自己不太搭调的人建立和谐的关系，但是你又不想按照他们的方式生活，那么你将忍受更多。你爱的这些人并不省事。

So what can you do? One thing is to transform yourself in such a way, that being in your presence, unknowingly, they will turn around.

那么你可以做什么？有一点是你可以转化你自己---转化你的存在方式，不知不觉中，你和他们的相处状况会转变。

Sometime ago, I went out and it started raining. I was carrying both my phones because I was expecting some calls. One phone is for India, and one is for outside-India calls. I had one in my jacket and the other in my trouser pockets, and they got wet and both the phones got fried. So, people around me were telling me, “Sadhguru, why carry two phones? Now, we can have two SIM cards in one phone. This is a Chinese phone. If you hold it one way, you can speak on the India SIM card. If you turn it around, it just shifts into the other SIM card. You don’t have to switch anything.” I did not get the phone, but you must become like this if you wish to take people who are around you with you. If you want to walk alone, it is very easy. If you want to take people with you, it takes a considerable amount of effort.

有一次，我出门在外，天开始下雨。因为我在等电话，所以我把两个手机都带在身上，分别用来接打印度的电话和印度以外的电话。我把一个手机放在了外套口袋里，另一个放在裤子口袋里，结果两个手机都淋湿了。我周围的人跟我说，“萨古鲁，为什么你要带两个手机？现在你可以把两张SIM卡放在同一部手机里，这是一种中国的电话。你这样拿着它的时候你可以使用印度的SIM卡，你把它这样转过来，就自动转到另一张SIM卡了，并且你不需要转换任何东西。”我没有这样的手机，但是如果你想和周围的人一起生活前行，你就必须像这样来转换自己。如果你想一个人前行，那很简单；如果你想和别人一起前行，那你需要付出更多的努力。

Gautama was asked this question, “Is it better to walk alone on the path or with a companion?”

以前有人问乔达摩：“一个人独自行走好还是结伴而行好？”

He said, “It is better to walk alone than to walk with a fool.”

乔达摩答道：“独自行走比和一个傻瓜同行好。”

Because they can take such a lot of energy and time, and you do not know, they may be stronger than you and take you their way rather than you taking them your way. There is every possibility.

因为他们可能会花费你很多的精力和时间，并且你可能不知道他们也许比你更强大，所以没等你把他们带向你的轨道你反而被他们影响。各种可能都存在。

I will not say what Gautama said. All I am saying is, it does not matter how you walk, as far as your spiritual process is concerned, anyway you are alone. Nobody is with you. It is only the bodily process, the material process of life, which you can share with people. You come alone and you go alone. Even if you have a twin brother or sister, you still come alone and go alone. When it comes to the spirit, anyway you walk alone. Do not mix that up. That part of it you handle well. The material part of it, handle it according to your capability. You must see what you are capable of and what you are not capable of. If your partner comes your way, it is wonderful. If they do not, it is alright. Do not grudge them. It is just that you do not have to go that way.

我不是要重复乔达摩那样的话，我想说的是，你怎样走没关系，只要你关注的是你的修行过程，不管怎样你都是独自一人，没有人和你一起。你可以和别人分享的只有生活中的物质过程。你独自一人来也将独自一人去，即使你有一个双胞胎弟兄或姐妹，你仍然是来去一个人。当说到精神，不管怎样你始终都是一个人，这点要清楚。好好处理这一部分。关于物质的那一部分，根据你的能力来处理。你必须清楚什么是你能做的什么是你没办法做的。如果你的同伴能和你志同道合，那很美好；如果不能，那也没关系。不要怨恨他们，你也不需要走他们的路，这样就好。

Love&Grace,

Sadhguru

爱与恩典

萨古鲁

原文链接：

http://isha.sadhguru.org/blog/sadhguru/masters-words/a-seekers-relationship-blues/